By Kute BlacksonThere are over 6 billion people on the planet. Each with their own unique personalities and expression.
Every person is in your life for a reason whether you see it or not. Each person is here to teach you something and has a gift for your soul’s evolution. Each person reflects some aspect of yourself that needs to be loved, forgiven, embraced or simply accepted.
The more you can accept and love yourself as you are.
The more you can accept and love those around you as they are.
The freer you will be.
Trying to change someone into your ideal version of who you would like them to be only creates suffering for you.
This is not in your control.
Let me repeat: This is NOT in your control.
Do not look for a perfect relationship, a perfect person, a perfect lover in the relative constantly changing world. Personalities are imperfect, will collide, will make mistakes, will create friction and challenge at times.
Don’t look for perfection at the level of the personality yours or others. This will only lead to more suffering.
The real perfection is to be found at the depth of your Being, which is untouched and free.
We often have these ideals of who we want a person to be, whether a spouse, a child or a friend. We end up resisting who they are in reality right now or living in some fantasy of their yet realized potential.
This gap between your ideal of who you want them to be and the current reality is suffering. The bigger that gap, the bigger your suffering.
A profound freedom opens up when you totally accept the person you are faced with as they are. You then no longer give your power away to anyone or need him or her to be different in order for you to feel different or happy.
You are free.
Sometimes deep down we are actually afraid of fully accepting someone as they are, because we feel that accepting would mean having to face the possibility that either you won’t get what you want from them, or that your relationship will have to change form or that you will need to stay stuck in the same patterns.
So it’s easier to keep resisting in order to not feel the heartbreak, loss, hopelessness or unmet need.
It is when you choose acceptance that you really have choice as to how you want to participate and interact a people with people in a way that serves both of you.
Most often it’s not the other person upsetting you. They are simply being who they are being in this moment irrespective of you. They have been being the way they have been being even before you showed up. Remember: it’s not personal even though it might seem that way in the moment.
When you drop your expectation of who someone should or shouldn’t be, it frees you. It opens up the space for you to receive whatever that person is actually able to give you – rather than focusing on who they are not, what they cannot give you and being angry with that. When you face the reality of who they are, then you can focus on what they are able to give you, and enjoy that even if it is not your ideal. It is what it is. You don’t expect a 2-year-old child to drive your car or have a conversation about quantum physics. You fully accept where they are in their development, thus loving and enjoying them fully.
You are then free to simply love. And it is this energy of loving that will actually be the invisible force that is more likely to impact those in your life and be the transformative element to facilitate shifts than any judging or demands.
Your loving compassion creates the safe space for transformation.
At the deepest level of Soul, we are all ONE. This is ultimately where we shall all have a truly perfect relationship with each other, because we are each other.
We are ONE.
Love. Now.Kute
